If you are considering divorce, and have heard of divorce mediation, why not use this method, which is thought to be a healthy, civilized and cost effective.
These 10 questions/misconceptions may give you an idea of whether to pursue this method of divorce resolution:
5 Initial questions for couples looking to mediate:
- Do you think you would be able to express your goals, interests and concerns, without holding back on what you think is important?
Fact: It is essential for each party to be able to express what is important to them, during mediation is the time to say what your position on a particular issue is and why you have that position.
2. Would you be able to listen to the goals, interests and concerns of your spouse with an open mind?
Fact is: During mediation sessions, each party has an opportunity to talk and it is very important that during this time, the other party really listens to what is being said and why it is being said. That is part of figuring out how things will unfold and do so in a way that works for all involved.
3. Do you trust your spouse to disclose all relevant financial information?
Fact is: A level of trust is essential to have as it relates to disclosing all assets and liabilities whether jointly or solely held. Everything must be put on the table to allow for full discussion and result in an agreement that each party believes is fair.
4. Are you interested in reaching a fair agreement, one that will work for each party now and well into the future?
Fact is: For a mediation to be successful, parties need to come in wanting an agreement that is fair under the circumstances. Mediation is not a process for parties who basically want a win-lose situation with a divorce agreement that is clearly lopsided.
5. Are you willing to discuss various options and possible scenarios as may be necessary in order to reach agreements on all issues?
Fact is: Some topics require more time and consideration. In order to reach agreements on all the issues, there will be times when various options need to be considered in order to figure out the scenario that will work out best for each party involved.
5 misconceptions about divorce mediation:
1. My spouse and I need to come with agreements to the mediation
Truth is: Mediation is a process where needs are identified, topics are discussed/not argued, options are generated and smart decisions made. No agreements are necessary at the start of the process; just an agreement to disclose, discuss and decide.
2. Mediating as a way to divorce will take a long time.
Truth is: The entire Mediation process generally take a matter of a few months unless the parties wish it to be quicker or longer; compare to 1 year plus for the traditional court representation/litigation process.
3. Mediation will be expensive.
Truth is: Our average mediation for a couple with children, asset/liability and cash flow (child support, alimony) discussions is (4) two hour sessions plus court document and divorce agreement preparation for under $5,000 it total; compare to our average representation/litigation, case which costs approximately $20,000 per person.
4. After we are finished with mediation, we will need lawyers to draft the documents.
Truth is: If you mediate with a mediator who is also an attorney, your divorce agreement and all other necessary court documents are prepared for you by this attorney; compare to mediating with a non-attorney that is not able to prepare these requiring you to retain yet another professional.
5. I/we will not be able to speak to outside experts to consult with.
Truth is: Mediation is an open process and consulting with outside professionals is encouraged if the parties wish to seek legal, financial, insurance and child related opinions.
If you think divorce mediation may be the best path for you and your family, get started by clicking below:
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Here is a link to another blog you may find helpful:
/blog/7-compelling-reasons-you-should-choose-divorce-mediation-0
